{"id":2090,"date":"2021-12-12T21:46:10","date_gmt":"2021-12-12T21:46:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.sesdergisi.ca\/?p=2090"},"modified":"2021-12-12T21:47:28","modified_gmt":"2021-12-12T21:47:28","slug":"muhteseme-mektuplar-11","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sesdergisi.ca\/?p=2090","title":{"rendered":"Muhte\u015feme Mektuplar 11"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 <strong>BET\u00dcL AYDAN<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Sevgili Muhte\u015fem;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Ge\u00e7 kal\u0131nm\u0131\u015f bir zamandan yaz\u0131yorum sana bu mektubumu. En son mektubunda \u201cNe zaman?\u2019\u2019 diye sormu\u015ftun. Ben de, bilmiyorum, demi\u015ftim hat\u0131rlars\u0131n. \u201c\u015eimdi\u2019\u2019 diyebilmek \u00e7ok \u00f6nemli bir erdem olsa gerek. \u0130nsan\u0131n \u015fimdiyle bar\u0131\u015f\u0131k olmas\u0131 ne g\u00fczeldir de\u011fil mi Muhte\u015fem? Hi\u00e7 ertelememesi, s\u00fcrekli hareket ederek yapmas\u0131 gerekeni yapmas\u0131d\u0131r belki de \u015fimdinin di\u011fer bir tan\u0131m\u0131. Bilmem sen ne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorsun \u015fimdi i\u00e7in, ge\u00e7mi\u015f ve gelecek i\u00e7in. Benim ya\u015fad\u0131k\u00e7a ve ya\u015fland\u0131k\u00e7a bak\u0131\u015f\u0131m de\u011fi\u015fti zamanlara. Saatleri Ayarlama Enstit\u00fcs\u00fc\u2019n\u00fc hat\u0131rl\u0131yorsun de\u011fil mi? Sonra o \u201cMuvakk\u0131t\u2019\u2019l\u0131 dizeler d\u00fc\u015fss\u00fcn tam da \u015fimdi mektubumuza:\u2019\u2019 \u015eeb-i yeld\u00e2y\u0131 m\u00fcneccimle muvakkit ne bilir \/ M\u00fcbtel\u00e2-y\u0131 gama sor kim geceler ka\u00e7 saat? (Asl\u0131nda en uzun geceyi y\u0131ld\u0131zlar ve g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcyle ilgilenen insanlar bilmez, bilemezler. Gama, a\u015fk derdine d\u00fc\u015fenler ya\u015farlar en uzun geceyi. Bitmeyen geceleri yaln\u0131z a\u015fk derdine meftun olanlar bilirler. Sen a\u015fk derdine m\u00fcptela olmu\u015f kavu\u015famayan a\u015f\u0131\u011fa sorarsan bunu belki ancak anlars\u0131n. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc onun i\u00e7in geceler kim bilir ka\u00e7 saat? ) \u201cAma yine de \u00fcz\u00fcnt\u00fcl\u00fc, kayg\u0131l\u0131 insanlar kadar muvakk\u0131tlar da biliyor olsa gerek zaman\u0131n uzunlu\u011funu, k\u0131sal\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131. \u00d6n\u00fcm\u00fczdeki g\u00fcnlerde burada saatlar yine geri al\u0131nacak ve k\u0131\u015f dokunacak saatlare so\u011fuk ve beyaz elleriyle. Karanl\u0131k daha \u00e7ok s\u00fcrecek. Uzun k\u0131\u015f geceleri masallardan \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p evlerimizde ziyaret edecek bizi. Yeni bir zamana al\u0131\u015fma haz\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131nday\u0131m ben de \u015fimdi. \u00c7abuk \u00e7abuk biten her g\u00fcn\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan kuca\u011f\u0131m\u0131za d\u00fc\u015fecek kocaman ve karanl\u0131k ak\u015fam ve ard\u0131ndan gecenin i\u00e7inde kimbilir hangi hat\u0131ralar\u0131m gelip oturacak g\u00f6nl\u00fcmdeki misafirhaneye?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Biz de bilmiyoruz de\u011fil mi hayat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n en k\u0131ymetlisi \u201czaman\u2019\u2019\u0131n bizden neleri alaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve bize neleri verece\u011fini. Ya\u015fad\u0131k\u00e7a \u00f6\u011frenece\u011fimiz neler var kimbilir! Kimi \u00e7ok h\u0131zl\u0131 kimi pek a\u011f\u0131r ad\u0131ml\u0131 olsa gerek bu de\u011fi\u015fimlerin. Hat\u0131rl\u0131yorsun de\u011fil mi o \u00e7ok sevdi\u011fimiz s\u00f6z\u00fc? Hen\u00fcz gen\u00e7, \u00e7ok gen\u00e7ken defterlerimizin ba\u015f\u0131nda yazard\u0131 muhtemelen okuduklar\u0131m\u0131zdan \u00f6\u011frendi\u011fimiz ve sevdi\u011fimiz bir c\u00fcmle: \u201cG\u00fcnler ad\u0131n\u0131 bilmedi\u011fimiz \u015feylere a\u00e7\u0131yor yelkenlerini\u2019\u2019 Ne \u00e7ok \u015fey vard\u0131 o zaman da bildi\u011fimizi sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ve asl\u0131nda asla bilmedi\u011fimiz. Ya da hi\u00e7 tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z, hissedemedi\u011fimiz yeni gelen duygular, hisler. &#8230; Evet ya s\u00f6yleyen ne ho\u015f s\u00f6ylemi\u015fti. G\u00fcnler evet g\u00fcnlerdi ad\u0131n\u0131 bilmedi\u011fimiz \u015feylere a\u00e7an yelkenini!<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Peki biz nas\u0131l tan\u0131\u015ft\u0131k Muhte\u015fem, o anlam\u0131n\u0131 bilmedi\u011fimiz her kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z yeni duygu, ortam ve duygularla? Hat\u0131rlars\u0131n sen de \u201cBen ya\u015fam\u0131yor gibi ya\u015fam\u0131yor gibi ya\u015f\u0131yorum.\u2019\u2019 \u015eiir dizeleriyle ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m zamanlar\u0131. Hani hi\u00e7bir \u015feyin tad\u0131n\u0131 alamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m zamanlar, tamamen korkuyla kaplanan bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131m, yine bir dize tekrar\u0131yla \u2018\u2019Ha geldiler ha gelecekler!\u2019\u2019 endi\u015feli kap\u0131ya bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131m. Bir korku filminde sessizce \u00e7evrilen bir kap\u0131 kilidi ya da kap\u0131 de\u011fildi korkum. Belki yabanc\u0131 ellerin yumruklar\u0131yla evin i\u00e7ini sarsan kap\u0131 sesi, belki uzun ve hi\u00e7 susmayacak san\u0131lan zilin ac\u0131 ac\u0131 \u00e7almas\u0131! B\u00fct\u00fcn saat alarmlar\u0131n\u0131n geceye ya da sabaha uyan\u0131rken korkuyla kurulmas\u0131&#8230; Apartman i\u00e7inde asans\u00f6r \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken i\u00e7indekilerin korku filmlerindekilerden bile daha korkun\u00e7 oldu\u011fu hissi! Ne zordu o g\u00fcnlerde ya\u015famak. Yine de iyi hissetmek zorunda olmak kendini. G\u00f6zlerine bakan \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6zlerine g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemek, sonra lokmalar bo\u011faz\u0131ndan zor ge\u00e7erken zor da olsa yudum yudum i\u00e7mek bir \u015feyleri. G\u00f6zlerinden ya\u015flar bo\u015fanmas\u0131n diye derin derin nefesler i\u00e7inde tutmak sonra da lavabodaki su sesine kar\u0131\u015f\u0131p giden h\u0131\u00e7k\u0131r\u0131klar. Ah hayat! Kimini a\u011flatan, kimini g\u00fcld\u00fcren bu his yani ya\u015famak belki de ne kadar s\u00fcrprizlerle dolu de\u011fil mi Muhte\u015fem?<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Kar\u0131\u015f\u0131k karmakar\u0131\u015f\u0131k duygular\u0131n i\u00e7inde d\u00f6ne d\u00f6ne d\u00fcnyadan \u00f6telere yava\u015f yava\u015f evrilmesi insan\u0131n b\u00e7yle bir \u015fey olsa gerek Muhte\u015fem. Mesela; d\u00fcn ben hayalen bir \u015fehrindeydim \u00fclkemin: G\u00fcnlerdir i\u00e7imde \u2018\u2019 \u00dclkendeki ku\u015flardan ne haber vard\u0131r?\u2019\u2019 dizeleri gezinip duruyor. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnde kanat \u00e7\u0131rpan her ku\u015fa selam veriyorum kalbimle. Onlar da biliyorlar benim u\u00e7amad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131. Belki \u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcyorlard\u0131r hem benim i\u00e7in ve benim gibi \u2018\u2019Gurbet\u2019\u2019\u015fiirini an be an ya\u015fayanlar i\u00e7in. Do\u011fdu\u011fum b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm yerleri \u00e7ok \u00f6zledi\u011fimi g\u00f6zlerim s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor onlara. Beni anl\u0131yorlar, hissediyorum. Sen zaten benim duygular\u0131m\u0131 biliyorsun Muhte\u015fem. Ad\u0131n kadar iyi anl\u0131yorsun beni. Sana orada bana buralarda uzaklar\u0131 yak\u0131nla\u015ft\u0131ran mektuplarla konu\u015fmak d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. Sanki \u015fimdi biz iki \u0131rmak gibiyiz. Derinden derine a\u011flayan. Belki bir g\u00fcn o yayla k\u00f6y\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn \u00e7oban \u00e7e\u015fmesinde bulu\u015fmak nasip olur. Olur mu dersin Muhte\u015fem? Yoksa \u00f6l\u00fcm gibi bir \u015fey olur da kavu\u015fmak uza\u011fa \u00e7ok uzaklara m\u0131 atar bizden kendini? \u201cYa Nasip!\u2019\u2019 diyelim eskilerin eskimeyen s\u00f6zlerinden serin r\u00fczgarlar\u0131 i\u00e7imize \u00e7ekerek.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Hani sana demi\u015ftim ya Muhte\u015fem: \u201c\u00c7ok \u00f6zledi\u011fim her \u015feyin hayaliyle ya\u015f\u0131yorum.\u2019\u2019 diye, yine o zamanlar\u0131n birinde r\u00fcya gibi bir \u015fey oldu g\u00f6zlerimi kapatt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda. Eski bir cami avlusu ve \u015fad\u0131rvandaki g\u00fcvercinler ve kanat \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131\u015flar\u0131. Hangi \u015fiirin hangi dizelerinde gezindim biliyorsun. O l\u00e2huti iklimde sudan ve ye\u015fillikten ibaret olan \u015fehri sen de \u00e7ok iyi biliyorsun. Hani oturup \u015fehrin manzaras\u0131n\u0131 izleyerek \u00e7ay i\u00e7ti\u011fimiz mek\u00e2n ne g\u00fczeldi de\u011fil mi Muhte\u015fem? \u0130nsan \u015fiirleri unutmamak i\u00e7in ezberlermi\u015f. . \u00c7ok bunald\u0131\u011f\u0131nda \u015fiirlerdeki tasvirlerle derin derin solurmu\u015f \u00f6zledi\u011fi \u015fehri. Bak ben seninle mektup yazarak konu\u015fuyorum. \u00d6zledi\u011fim \u015fehirlere de i\u00e7imden ge\u00e7en dizelere tuttunup hayallerini kurarak dokunuyorum. Y\u00fcz\u00fcmde bir tebess\u00fcm oluyor \u015fimdi yazarken oldu\u011fu gibi. Hat\u0131ra defterimde ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m karelerin foto\u011fraflar\u0131 beliriyor. Onlar beni hat\u0131rl\u0131yor, ben onlar\u0131 hi\u00e7 unutmuyorum. O eski \u015fehirlerimin kuruldu\u011fu ilk zamanlarda ya\u015fasayd\u0131m bu mektup bir \u201cG\u00fcvercin Gerdanl\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2019\u2019 nda u\u00e7acakt\u0131 sana. Hat\u0131rl\u0131yorsun de\u011fil mi \u00fcniversite y\u0131llar\u0131nda kitaplar\u0131m\u0131z aras\u0131ndayd\u0131 gerdan\u0131nda inciden k\u0131ymetli yaz\u0131lar ta\u015f\u0131yan o g\u00fcvercinler. G\u00fczeldi, ho\u015ftu.<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8230;<span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2091,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[127],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v15.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Muhte\u015feme Mektuplar 11 - SES MAGAZINE<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.sesdergisi.ca\/?p=2090\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Muhte\u015feme Mektuplar 11 - 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