NURLANA MEMMEDOVA<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n
…Bu o zamand\u0131 ki, m\u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcrd\u00fcm, n\u0259n\u0259m balacala\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259n\u0259 m\u00fcc\u0259rr\u0259d v\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 g\u00f6rs\u0259nirdi. Onda onun q\u0259rib\u0259liyinin s\u0259b\u0259bi bilmirdim. \u0130ndi anlay\u0131ram, m\u0259nim n\u0259n\u0259m \u015fair idi. \u00d6z\u00fc d\u0259 s\u00f6z\u00fcn b\u00fct\u00fcn m\u0259nalar\u0131nda. T\u0259kc\u0259 s\u00f6zl\u0259riyl\u0259 yox, h\u0259m d\u0259 \u0259m\u0259ll\u0259riyl\u0259. Tez- tez jaketinin cibl\u0259rini doldurub m\u0259kt\u0259b yolunda durar, d\u0259rsd\u0259n qay\u0131dan u\u015faqlara konfetl\u0259ri, yayda t\u0259ndirin \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ki taxtaya s\u0259rib g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f alt\u0131nda qurutdu\u011fu zo\u011fal v\u0259 alma qurular\u0131n\u0131 paylayard\u0131. Onun \u0259m\u0259lind\u0259n \u00e7ox dediyi p\u0259rak\u0259nd\u0259 s\u00f6zl\u0259r m\u0259ni heyr\u0259tl\u0259ndir\u0259rdi: \u201cFa\u011f\u0131rlar, a\u00e7 susuz d\u0259rsd\u0259n qay\u0131d\u0131rlar, h\u0259l\u0259 evl\u0259rin\u0259 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r yol var…\u201d<\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259m q\u0131z \u00f6vladlar\u0131n\u0131, q\u0131z n\u0259v\u0259l\u0259rini d\u0259 \u201co\u011ful\u201d dey\u0259 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131 v\u0259 bu m\u0259nim \u00e7ox xo\u015fuma g\u0259lirdi. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 m\u0259nd\u0259n soru\u015fdu:<\/p>\n – Ay o\u011ful, bu q\u0259d\u0259r kitab oxuyursan, n\u0259\u00e7i olacaqsan b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u0259nd\u0259?<\/p>\n Yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131:<\/p>\n – m\u0259n fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259d\u0259n v\u0259 bir az da lov\u011fal\u0131qla cavab verdim.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259m g\u00f6zl\u0259rini m\u0259chul bir n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 dikib dedi:<\/p>\n -Ehh, yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 olma\u011fa n\u0259 var, kitab yazma\u011fa n\u0259 var… yaz\u0131rsan; toxumlar \u00f6l\u00fcr, sonra yava\u015f yava\u015f c\u00fcc\u0259rir, daha sonra g\u00f6yl\u0259r\u0259 \u0259rir…<\/p>\n M\u0259n q\u0259hq\u0259h\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kdim:<\/p>\n – Ay n\u0259n\u0259, s\u0259n lap elmi traktat yazd\u0131n ki…\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 \u00f6z al\u0259mind\u0259 hans\u0131sa bayat\u0131lar\u0131, laylalar\u0131 s\u00f6yl\u0259yirdi. H\u0259rd\u0259n d\u0259 \u0259ll\u0259rini stola vurub ritm tuturdu. O bunlar\u0131 m\u0259nim anlamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m hans\u0131sa s\u0259b\u0259b\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 \u201cnam\u0259\u201d adland\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. B\u00fct\u00fcn bu nam\u0259l\u0259ri o \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n qo\u015furdu. B\u0259zil\u0259ri a\u011flamal\u0131, b\u0259zil\u0259ri g\u00fclm\u0259li olurdu.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Onda h\u0259v\u0259s\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb m\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7ox ist\u0259yirdim ki, birc\u0259 b\u0259nd d\u0259 olsa \u015feir qo\u015fum, amma he\u00e7 c\u00fcr al\u0131nm\u0131rd\u0131. Qurdu\u011fum c\u00fcml\u0259l\u0259r n\u0259n\u0259minki kimi \u015firin al\u0131nm\u0131rd\u0131. Adi, n\u0259qli c\u00fcml\u0259l\u0259ri yazma\u011fa n\u0259 var ki, h\u00fcn\u0259rin var \u0259qli c\u00fcml\u0259l\u0259r \u0259rs\u0259y\u0259 g\u0259tir. N\u0259n\u0259m deyirdi ki, onlar\u0131 ham\u0131 s\u00f6yl\u0259y\u0259 bilm\u0259z, onlar g\u00f6yd\u0259n g\u0259lir v\u0259 h\u0259r adam\u0131n q\u0259lbin\u0259 ya\u011fm\u0131r… O, c\u00fcrb\u0259c\u00fcr mahn\u0131lar\u0131, bayat\u0131lar\u0131 h\u0259m i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 oxuyurdu, h\u0259m d\u0259 sakit dayan\u0131b g\u00f6zl\u0259ri yol \u00e7\u0259k\u0259nd\u0259…<\/p>\n Bir d\u0259f\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259min harasa \u00f6p\u00fc\u015f g\u00f6nd\u0259rdiyini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n -Ay n\u0259n\u0259, kimi \u00f6p\u00fcrs\u0259n?<\/p>\n -G\u00f6z\u0259g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259zi.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n -Niy\u0259?<\/p>\n -Sevir\u0259m onu.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m g\u00f6yd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n o s\u00f6zl\u0259r\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 \u00f6z tanr\u0131s\u0131na minn\u0259tdarl\u0131q edirdi.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259min dualar\u0131 ba\u015fqa c\u00fcr idi. M\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s kitabdak\u0131 dualardan deyildi. M\u0259n onun dediyi h\u0259r \u015feyi ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fcm. O \u00e7ox sad\u0259 dild\u0259 tanr\u0131s\u0131 il\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. O, \u00e7ox \u0259min idi ki, tanr\u0131 onu h\u0259r v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259 dinl\u0259yir… M\u0259n ondan c\u0259nn\u0259t- c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m bar\u0259d\u0259 soru\u015fanda, – onsuz da m\u0259n c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m, – deyirdi.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n V\u0259 bir g\u00fcn m\u0259nim \u015fair n\u0259n\u0259m \u00e7arpay\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131nda oturub s\u00f6k\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f corablar\u0131 yamayanda \u0259b\u0259di yuxuya getdi. \u0130yn\u0259si sap\u0131 \u0259lind\u0259… \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 yuma\u011fa d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc…<\/p>\n N\u0259n\u0259mi ayn\u0259b\u0259ndin ortas\u0131nda uzatm\u0131\u015fd\u0131lar. Qad\u0131nlar c\u0259naz\u0259ni d\u00f6vr\u0259y\u0259 al\u0131b a\u011f\u0131 deyirdil\u0259r. Yax\u0131nlarda \u2013 bir ay \u00f6nc\u0259 atas\u0131 r\u0259hm\u0259t\u0259 getmi\u015f day\u0131m arvad\u0131 is\u0259 deyirdi: \u201cAy ana, ay ana, bizi qoyub ged\u0259n ana! M\u0259ktub vers\u0259m, atama apararsanm\u0131, ay anaa?!\u201d Xalam da m\u0259kt\u0259b vaxt\u0131 \u0259zb\u0259rl\u0259diyi \u015feirl\u0259rd\u0259n par\u00e7alar deyib a\u011flay\u0131rd\u0131. M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki, n\u0259n\u0259min ruhu onlara bax\u0131b g\u00fcl\u00fcr.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n M\u0259nim a\u011flama\u011f\u0131m g\u0259lmirdi, \u0259ksin\u0259, hirsl\u0259nirdim ki, onlar m\u0259nim i\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 ip\u0259k n\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 niy\u0259 bel\u0259 s\u00f6n\u00fck, kobud a\u011flay\u0131rlar ax\u0131…<\/p>\n S\u0259n d\u00fcz deyirmi\u015fs\u0259n, n\u0259n\u0259can, d\u00fcz deyirs\u0259nmi\u015f ki, h\u0259r insan s\u00f6z deyib, a\u011f\u0131, bayat\u0131 qo\u015fammaz… Bu fikirl\u0259rl\u0259 aynab\u0259ndi t\u0259rk edib n\u0259n\u0259min ota\u011f\u0131na ke\u00e7dim v\u0259 art\u0131q onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, ham\u0131dan \u00e7ox dar\u0131xma\u011fa ba\u015flayan \u00e7arpay\u0131s\u0131nda uzand\u0131m. O biri otaqdan is\u0259 s\u0259s \u2013 k\u00fcy g\u0259lirdi;\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n V\u0259 onda m\u0259nim bu ya\u015fa q\u0259d\u0259r h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 anlamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m o hadis\u0259 ba\u015f verdi q\u0259fild\u0259n n\u0259n\u0259min s\u0259sini e\u015fitdim:\u201cG\u00f6rd\u00fcn, s\u0259n\u0259 demi\u015fdim, c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259c\u0259m?!\u201d G\u00f6zl\u0259rimi a\u00e7d\u0131m v\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 yayl\u0131qla u\u00e7du\u011funu g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Yerimd\u0259n dik at\u0131ld\u0131m. Otaqda he\u00e7 k\u0259s yox idi. Bu yuxu idimi? C\u0259ld qap\u0131ya qa\u00e7d\u0131m, qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7anda h\u0259y\u0259td\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259min c\u0259naz\u0259sini day\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131n \u00e7iynind\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm, onu son m\u0259nzil\u0259 yola sal\u0131rd\u0131lar. M\u0259n \u00e7a\u015f\u0131b qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m, he\u00e7 k\u0259s\u0259 dey\u0259 bilm\u0259dim ki, n\u0259n\u0259m indic\u0259 orda ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 yayl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 u\u00e7urdu…\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Bu \u0259hvalat he\u00e7 bir zaman m\u0259nim yad\u0131mdan \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131r. M\u0259n yasda a\u011flamam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m, ill\u0259r sonra bu hadis\u0259ni s\u0259tirl\u0259r\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcr\u0259nd\u0259 h\u00f6nk\u00fcrt\u00fc il\u0259 a\u011flad\u0131m. Anlad\u0131m ki, n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 ham\u0131dan yax\u0131n bilib, g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcb ki, ondan narahat olmay\u0131m.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n \u0130ll\u0259r ke\u00e7ib, m\u0259n o nam\u0259l\u0259ri bir bir yad\u0131ma sal\u0131ram v\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn dar\u0131x\u0131ram…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" NURLANA MEMMEDOVA …Bu o zamand\u0131 ki, m\u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcrd\u00fcm, n\u0259n\u0259m balacala\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.\u00a0 N\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259n\u0259 m\u00fcc\u0259rr\u0259d v\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 g\u00f6rs\u0259nirdi. Onda onun<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1957,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n